Are we beating the same rhythm?
Tough to sum up my week in a few sentences. Had a totally different Week 6 from the other 5 weeks. The timing is not right and it has never been right for me, thus far. Sometimes I rather stay in my own comfort zone and not try to venture, because sometimes things can get too adventurous for my heart to take when I travel too far.
Well, today I had a rare encounter, which made me realised that I have changed in some way.
On the way to NIE via bus 198, I saw a lady in her late 20s opposite my seat talking to another man. They seemed like they were having a tiff as the lady appeared as "begging" the man for forgiveness. I sat down, took off my spectacles and cleaned it. Suddenly, I saw that lady approaching the seat beside mine and she stretched out her hand to try to remove my earphone. I was taken aback obviously. Then I heard:"Just give me 5 mins, just 5 mins".
I hurriedly put my spectacles on and was surprised to hear her "crying". "Please, please give me $10. I need to see the doctor. I got no $". It was another case of begging in public, which I had encountered several times. This time, I felt differently, though not heartless.
"Giving you $10 wont help you." I told her calmly.
"Can. Consultation fee is only $9+". I was surprised to hear that. It seemed that she had her calculations done before she boarded the bus to solicit.
This time, I didnt want to commit the same mistake which I did in the past.
"Do you know it is not right? If you get caught doing this, no one will be around to take care of your family". She paused, as if the words got into her ears but not her heart. "Please, I beg you. I kneel down and beg you". She constantly placed her hand on my arm and I had to repeatedly remove her hand, lest she counter accuse me of molest.
"Giving you $10 wont help your situation. If you need help, you have to seek help from the government". Then I was even more astonished when she turned her head and told me:"No $10 nevermind. $2 also can".
I left the bus when I reached the MRT station, telling myself that I need to stand firm. Immediately after I left, she went towards the back and solicted from the others.
Which is the right thing to do? Sympathise with her because she pleaded and even went to the extend of kneeling down to implore, so giving her what she demanded will appease my heart? Or tell her the reality that there is no free lunch in this world, that no one should beg for a living? I was sad that despite being able bodied, she is not earning her own keep by working. I have met so many less able bodied people who yearns and works very hard in order to get a job, so that they could be self reliant. Why would one person's dignity, self-esteem and self-worth be only worth $10?
Do I want to give my students a fish each day to sustain them daily, or do I want to teach them the skill of fishing so that they wont go hungry even without me? What's yours? I want to teach people the art of fishing.